Unloving parents and emotional neglect

Unloving parents don’t realize how much of an impact their behavior and the quality of the relationship they have with their child from birth to adulthood, especially from birth to adolescence, have on their child’s self-love, self-worth, self-esteem, emotional and mental well-being. When a parent or caretaker does not accept a child as they are and often tries to change them or make them behave as they want that parent or caretaker basically tells the child he/she is unacceptable. Thus, a seed of feeling unaccepted by the world is planted.

From the very first moment a child enters this world, they’re like a tiny seed, waiting to grow into the most magnificent flower. But here’s the thing: the way a parent nurtures that seed from birth to adolescence can have a monumental impact on their self-love, self-worth, self-esteem, emotional well-being, and mental health.

Parents must be conscious that they are the guardian of this precious little seedling. A parent’s love and care are like sunshine and water, essential for growth. But what happens when, instead of nurturing, a parent tries to mold that seedling into something it’s not? Well, that parent inadvertently send a message to the child that he/she is not good enough as he/she is.

Imagine telling a budding sunflower, “You should be a rose,” or a sapling oak tree, “You should be a palm tree.” It sounds absurd, right? Well, in the world of parenting, it can happen more often than we’d like to admit. When parents don’t accept children for who they are and constantly try to make them fit into predefined molds, they’re essentially planting a seed of self-doubt and insecurity.

But here’s the good news – it’s never too late to shift gears and become the nurturing gardener to yourself as an adult, the one that you needed when you were a child.

You can start by embracing your uniqueness. Just like no two snowflakes are alike, no two children are either. Embrace your unique qualities and quirks. Celebrate what makes you special and encourage yourself to express your individuality. You are not meant to be a replica of anyone; you are meant to be the best version of yourself.

Work on building your self-esteem. Enjoy your interests and passions. When you achieve something, no matter how small, celebrate it! These victories, even if they seem trivial, are monumental for your inner child healing. They boost your self-esteem and self-worth.

Listen to yourself and your inner child. Create a safe space within yourself to openly express yourself to yourself. Listen to your thoughts, feelings, and concerns without judgment. It will help you feel accepted and understood by you, which will reduce the importance of others accepting and understanding you.

Be your biggest cheerleader. Your words and actions have more power than you might realize. Speak words of encouragement and support regularly. Believe in yourself.

Remember that mistakes are learning opportunities. Making mistakes is part of growing. Instead of punishing yourself for errors, use them as teaching moments. Remind yourself all the time that it’s okay to stumble as long as you get up and keep moving forward.

A message to parents

Remember, you are shaping the future with every interaction. Your child is like clay, waiting to be molded by your love, acceptance, and understanding. Nurture their growth, and you’ll watch them bloom into the magnificent person they were meant to be. Listen to your child. Pay attention to who he/she is, their likes and dislikes, their dreams, their needs, and their personality. Create a safe and non-judgmental space for your children to express themselves and their emotions. Help them with their challenges with love and kindness. And, please work on yourself to be the best version of yourself because your child subconsciously refers to you as a role model. To become a parent is to embark on the journey of nurturing and empowering your children. Your love and support are the superpowers that will help them conquer the world with confidence.